Forgive to be Happy and Healthy
To forgive is crucial to our own well being. Is is important to forgive others as well as "yourself" then only you would be free from regret and guilt. Learn to Forgive and enjoy new level of Peace and Health.
HOW DO I FORGIVE MYSELF? Harder for people who love perfection in everything they do
Reprinted with permission from Ashwita Goel
Question from MS- What about forgiving ourselves? How do we forgive ourselves for the decision we made?Answer- Forgiving ourselves becomes an issue if we think that external situations control our capacity to be happy. If one choice could have made you happier and one less happier, then you are better off with the ‘wrong’ choice, because that wrong choice will help you learn much more effectively that choices – and external circumstances don’t have anything with your capacity for joy. When you realise this, forgiveness becomes redundant.
The second aspect is, if you are focused on a spiritual pathway, you are changing and growing everyday. So the person who made that wrong decision is not even who you are anymore, so who are you holding the grudge against?
Q from MS- I needed to hear this. But what if the decision is something not replaceable? Of course, all decisions are not replaceable, but for example, if we lose one job, we can get another job, or if we lose one lover, we can get another one. But what if the decision we made is something that we can never replace, then the it comes with regret. Yes it is true that we need to realise that external circumstances do not make us less happy… (ultimately), but how do we deal with such regret? Just see it as a “lesson”?
Ans- Then you ‘integrate it’ into your life. Ultimately we never chase things, we only chase how those things make us feel. So ask yourself what feeling you were chasing and remind yourself that you can feel that way without an external trigger.
Comment from MS -What you shared with me now is so much more profound then all the books and articles I have read about forgiveness. Tweet